"Well, tell him I can't see him right now.". These hilarious, clever, classic and witty one-liners will give anyone a good laugh! Funny nurse jokes clean. Moms and dads alike are sure to love these one-liners, smart jokes , and punny jokes . This week’s puns and one liners are all on the topic of Toe Jokes. Before we took the patient to the hospital, I had a question for his wife. His new nurse, Evelyn, took me to an examining room and told me to get undressed and have a seat until the doctor could see me. Jokerz has the best doctor jokes, doctor jokes one liners and the best of best doctor who jokes. Sarcastic One Liners Really mean insults Short stories with moral lessons. He won’t expect it back. << See All of our Jokes Categories Here! sickipedia.net,sickipedia,hottest joke, newest joke,leaderboard,joke,collection jokes,sick jokes,sick rude,joke pedia,sick article All Time's Hottest joke in One Liner view_day A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. Most of these cute one liners are from the iconic comedians and others are from random people. Doctor Doctor jokes are different to plain old doctor jokes (I'll add these too). A: A God doesn't think he is an orthopedic surgeon. A great collection of Nurse Jokes One Liners you could ever find on the internet. I had to put my foot down. A: He made a spectacle of himself Smart and funny one liners What do Green Eggs and Ham and Fifty Shades of Grey have in common? Milligan was born in … A: A URLologist Nurse Jokes One Liners . Fun Kids Jokes was created by parents as a safe place for other parents and their children to find something funny to giggle at. One-Liner Jokes. Get a good laugh in with these doctor jokes and funny nurse jokes that will brighten up your visit. Breasts don’t have eyes. Q: What do you call a student that got C's all the way through med school? A: A God doesn't think he is an orthopedic surgeon. Plow through Beano's muddy field of fantastically funny farmer jokes! 52 of them, in fact! Q: What is the difference between God and an orthopedic surgeon. A: "Do you see any change in me?" Q: Does an apple a day keep the doctor away? Orthopedic jokes that are not only about interchangeable but actually working neuro puns like I just got my new pair of orthopenic shoes and I stand corrected. If you like these Dr Who jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics. I told her, "You did it last A big list of colonoscopy jokes! Funny Golf One Liners … You’ll find funny, family-friendly jokes, riddles, one-liners, knock-knock jokes, puns, videos, and things we think are worth sharing with other parents. The dentist says "Well make up your mind I gotta adjust the chair!". A doctor tells a woman she can no longer touch anything alcoholic. See more ideas about jokes, medical humor, humor. Enjoy them all. Funny One-Liners 1. She said, "We can't do that!" Steal these classic one-liner jokes in our collection of the best one-liner jokes … Plug in a fake mouse. These are the One liner jokes, they are easy to remember and funny and you can make anyone laugh. Funny Golf One Liners Browse through team names to find fun jokes and cool team jokes. If you like these Dr Who jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics. Following is our collection of podiatrist puns and soles one-liner funnies and gags working better than reddit jokes. Get link for other Social Networks. 20. The jokes are for everyone who understands what it likes to get in the bed. See TOP 10 health one liners. Sourced from Reddit, Twitter, and beyond! The jokes will make you laugh so hard it would be hard to understand what you actually want the condom or the jokes. Search in the largest collection of one liners and puns. Search, watch, and cook every single Tasty recipe and video ever - all in one place! So she gets a divorce. Funny Doctor jokes- The old man Bob, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. Let us know what you think. Doctor doctor I think I am a computer. Q: What's the difference between a marriage and a mental hospital? Usually there's a doctor and a patient. Page 2. When they check the connection it seems to be working. Dirty Jokes! These are the best, funniest one-liners known to man. International Business Times has compiled a list of light-hearted jokes, puns, one-liners, and riddles, that are sure to make your small family gathering unforgettable. A woman says to the dentist "I don't know which is worse having a tooth pulled or having a Baby." For Rudolph to know the coming of Christmas, he has to look at a calen-deer. Top 50 Money Jokes – Short Quick One-Liners This is a compilation of funny, quick, short one liner jokes and sayings about money . Q: Did you hear about the optometrist that fell into his lens grinding machine? How do you get a sweet 80-year-old lady to say the F word? o O o. Famous One Liner Jokes. by Stephen. What do you call 2 orthopedic doctors reading an EKG? Celebrity Jokes! Rodney Dangerfield had captured the minds of his audience with his ribald, in-your-face humor. And let’s be honest, if you’re telling jokes to someone who is 103, they definitely could use a smile. Here are some famous one liner jokes that can easily lift your spirits. These hilarious jokes and quot es about getting older are sure to keep your mind sharp. My doctor told me I needed to break a sweat once a day so I told him I'd start lying to my wife. 70 best Christmas cracker jokes 2020: one liners and puns so bad they are funny to make you laugh this Xmas Enjoy these Christmas cracker jokes … They made me smile and I hope you'll smile too. Trouble remembering jokes? Get comfy, hide the kids, and read these NSFW dirty puns, jokes, and inappropriate one-liners that'll have you giggling and blushing in the best way. 57 jokes about doctors. The patient starts the joke by saying "Doctor, doctor!" If you enjoyed this page, you may also like. ... 2004, and his death created a void. However you can have your say by sharing your best one liners in the comments below. Nurse Jokes One Liners A great collection of Nurse Jokes One Liners you could ever find on the internet. BEST DIRTY JOKES EVER A mix of our favorite off-color dirty jokes for those who don't have a dirty mind, but rather sexy imagination. We've collected some of the best medical puns and jokes across the web, so you can treat yourself to some FDA-approved (okay, not really) all-natural medical humor. LOL at 55 best Mitch Hedberg quotes, jokes, and one liners. Enjoy. But one-liners don’t have to bring the cringe, some of them are smart, insightful, and stick with you for ages. I often get a 180 when I play with the local darts team. Add your one liner to our site and see how good it is. 32 of them, in fact! Q: How do you tell the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? Back to: People Jokes: Doctor Jokes. Simran Khurana is the Editor-in-Chief for ReachIvy, and a teacher and freelance A plastic surgeon's office the only place where no one gets offended when you pick your nose! A double blind study! The largest collection of doctor one-line jokes in the world. Read some of his best funny one liners. Q What is the difference between God and an orthopedic surgeon A God dosn't think he is an orthopedic surgeon. I know what most of you are thinking: Indiana – mafia. One-Liners Our funny one-liner jokes are short, sweet and make you laugh. Absolutely hillarious doctor one-liners! ... Last week’s theatre jokes are here. Dont forget to share with friends. A: Three. Farmer Jokes! Do you know a funny one liner? A: So she wouldn't wake the sleeping pills! I went into my proctologist's office for my first rectal exam. Enjoy our funny doctor jokes and puns. We are not trying to offend, just looking for a good laugh! A few days later, the doctor saw Bob walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm. Puns and one liners on the theme of Darts Jokes Hold on I will just connect you to the internet!" See our new one liners or check one liner of the day. on March 25, 2013. Find the perfect lines for your team. 3. A doctor is the only man who can tell a woman to take off all her clothes and then send a bill to her husband! ). Once you've milked this joke cow and you've got your fill of funny farmer jokes, why not check out these jokes about sheep , weather jokes and summer one-liners ? I am originally from Indiana. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The green, green grass of home.'" The largest collection of health one-line jokes in the world. These are great, because they are easy to remember and very funny. Let's read Short Jokes Of The Day about Nurse Jokes One Liners, Funny Nurse Jokes Clean Q: What did the man say to the x-ray technician after swallowing some money? ). Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Absolutely hillarious health one-liners! It's always a good time for hilarious one liners and funny short jokes. Medical Doctor Pick Up Lines! Here we have a great list of One liner jokes. Check out these funny one-liners and best one-liner jokes. Spike Milligan at 100: Best jokes and one-liners from the 'Godfather of Alternative Comedy' ‘My father had a profound influence on me. Well not anymore. Q: Did you hear about the baby born in the high tech delivery room? Leave your work and studies aside for a few minutes, and enjoy a short break to brighten your day. We all know the classic Knock Knock Doctor Who joke but how about some other funny Doctor jokes from the far flung corners of the internet. Sourced from Reddit, Twitter, and beyond! Doctor doctor there is a strawberry growing out of my head! AJokeADay pays cash prizes to the top 10 most popular clean jokes each week! 100 characters remaining. It is almost difficult to smile at jokes, but his quotes remind us that laughter is the essence of life. You can even use these one liners for Tinder or any other dating app. "It's not unusual." Discover which are your favorites to share with family and friends. I … See TOP 10 doctor one liners. Laugh all your worries away with these funny one liner jokes. Fifteen clean jokes and one-liner are perfect for making anyone from 3 to 103 laugh. A: By The taste. Q: How are enemas and divorces alike? One screw in the light bulb while seven holds Rudolph down. I guess to the Victor goes the spoils. Henry Youngman Stand Up Jokes Airport Jokes Getting on a plane, I told the ticket lady, "Send one of my bags to New York, send one to Los Angeles, and send one to Miami." My paramedic team was called to an emergency. It’s like, ‘Dude, you have to wait.’” This non-sequitur gets the … Q: Why did the doctor tell the nurse to walk past the pill cupboard quietly? Add Comments Comment and share this joke on Facebook or Twitter. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… Anyone who thinks onions are the only vegetable that can make you cry has never If you enjoyed this page, you may also like: "Doctor, there's a patient on line 1 that says he's invisible." Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb? Feel free to share these nursing jokes funny one liners with your friends and family.. Let's read Short Jokes Of The Day about Nurse Jokes One Liners, Funny Nurse Jokes Clean. Then vote for your favorite one at the page end. 5. Orthopedic Jokes. He told me to quit going to those places. If you are offended by any of the jokes, please complain to the site jokes … New Year’s Resolutions: In one year and out the other. A dog with his leg wrapped in bandages hobbles into a saloon. Read some of his best funny one liners. ... Dr. Visit for a colonoscopy. A: One treats what you have, the other thinks you have what he treats. Read some of his best funny one liners. Funny Jokes On Chartered Accountant With Hilarious Quotes,Shayari,Images Hello friends.Here in this post I'm going to share funny CA jokes,CA funny quotes,Funny shayari on Chartered Accountants,CA student life quotes and much more to enjoy 😀 dedicated to all CA students.. Christian One-Liners Don’t let your worries get the best of you. See more ideas about podiatry, bones funny, jokes. Alfred E. Neuman fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad , an American humor magazine A: Yes, but only if you aim it well enough. A doctor is the only man who can tell a woman to take off all her clothes and then send a bill to her husband! It turns out, a little bit of healthy laughter could even keep wrinkles at bay. Dr.'s are saying not to worry about the bird flu because it's tweetable. A: A double blind study! These are sneaky computer jokes that techies with too much time on their hands play on their co-workers, typically on April Fool's Day. Jul 11, 2018 - Explore Ron S Israeli MD, PC's board "Urology Jokes", followed by 1325 people on Pinterest. Jul 8, 2013 - Explore Philip S. Pinsker, D.P.M. If you like this American comedian, this page is for you. 22 Hilarious Nurse Jokes There’s an old saying that goes like this: The nurse who can smile when things go wrong is probably going off-duty. Doctor Jokes and Puns. And I would hear sounds… that sounded an awful lot like car horns. Take notes, commit these one-liners to memory, and your life will be better. A big list of frankenstein jokes! The house call is here! Dr. Pepper in One Liner Jokes. Unplug the original mouse. ... Dr. Frankenstein finally became popular enough in his own right to gain unlimited access to cemeteries and morgues for his creations. I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. Not all of them have a deeper meaning. “I saw this wino, he was eating grapes. Like beams of light. Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. Variation of this idea. "That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome." Before telling a … All sorted from the best by our visitors. Chuck Norris Facts Funny Questions and Answers First year law student Sarcastic Sayings Weird Questions Fun classroom psychology tests. Always borrow money from a pessimist. I went to buy some camo pants but couldn’t find any. They both Tagged As: funny medical one liners, funny one liners, health jokes, humour, joke, medical jokes • Meet the Author • Dr. Lawrence Kindo I am a Medical Professional with a passion for writing, blogging, playing, computers, and of course patient care. We put together 30 funniest doctor jokes. This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Leg Jokes. That's easy just put some cream on it! Q: What is the difference between God and an orthopedic surgeon. The dentist says "Well make up your mind I … Remember, Moses started out as a basket case. Whether we like it or not, the world changes every day. A good one-liner can serve so many purposes I don't even know where to begin. Hilarious puns and old people jokes to crack any time << We have over 150 Categories of Jokes on our Main Page! o O o. A woman says to the dentist "I don't know which is worse having a tooth pulled or having a Baby." So put aside your tiny tools, get on with this list of the amazing Condom jokes, and do not forget to share with your friends. and then goes on to explain some illness or symptom. They'll enjoy them too! It's the bus that takes me to the pub. One to find a bulb specialist, one to find a bulb installation specialist, and one to bill it all to Medicare. Q: What do you call 2 orthopedic doctors reading an EKG? Great drinking jokes and one liners. When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance. Self care and ideas to help you live a healthier, happier life. One from Dr Devious. 55 Short jokes. Best One Liners The Best 1 Line Jokes of All-Time Our list of the best one line jokes of all time are curated by the bunch of comedians that make up the ADDucation team. Doctor's office: All our records are electronic now just fill out these 12 forms. These clever one liners on life are perfect for any occasion. Clean Jokes! One liner tags: doctor, life, sarcastic 81.45 % / 466 votes. Via pinterest.com. A: Hopefully not your doctor. Q: What do you call a doctor that fixes websites? These one-liners are for you whether you need New Years eve jokes or you’re celebrating the big day itself. When I first tried a new cough syrup, I had no idea what to expectorate. Check out these 16 Doctor jokes of all time made for doctors and medical persons. Varicose: Near by/close by Vein: Conceited. 's board "Podiatry Jokes", followed by 120 people on Pinterest. He sidles up to the bar and A: At a mental hospital you have to show improvement to get out. Puns And One Liners. Feel free to share these nursing jokes funny one liners with your friends and family. A guy goes to the doctor. My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. And you can have a joke like these delivered on the hour, every hour now by following us on Twitter or liking us on Facebook . Last week’s theatre jokes are here. If you liked these, get on your bike and head to cycling jokes here, and there's more sports jokes and tennis jokes too! A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Bob and said: “You’re really doing great, aren’t you?” Heart-Stopping. Tape over the optical sensor of your friend's mouse. A: Three. Thorax: A Dr. Seuss character Triple Bypass: Better than a quarterback sneak Tumor: More than one, an extra pair. When I was on acid, I would see things. I wrote earlier in the week about attending the Mobile World Congress this week in Barcelona, where the new Samsung Galaxy S6 was launched, so what better a topic for this week’s one liners and puns than phone jokes. Are you looking for the best funny golf one liners? Many folks want to serve This lightbulb joke. Page 3. All sorted from the best by our visitors. Here are another 11 one-liners brought to my attention by readers over the past few Q: What's the difference between a general practitioner and a specialist? “Doctor, doctor, will I be able to play the violin after the operation?” “Yes, of course…” “Great! All funny one liners, including short jokes, clever one liners, witty one liners, corny one liners and dirty one liners. The quicker the humor the more sharp it may be and the quicker at making us laugh! Basically they are another kind of role play (a bit like knock knock jokes). Afterall laughing is said to be the best medicine. 3rd one says: "choro yaar bechara akela hai aur hum teen. 2. I don't think I'll be able to get my Mom what she really wants on Mother's Day – a doctor for a son-in-law. Rodney Dangerfield had captured the minds of his audience with his ribald, in-your-face humor. My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. Post Cancel. So enjoy this collection of 80 funny one liners! Also, take a look at our other funny jokes categories. And as always, check out our jokes page for loads more laughs! Did you hear about the latest birth control pill for men? I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point. He was right—I feel ten years older already. 42 Funny One Liner Jokes. Here are 11 great one-liner jokes that will make your toes curl I’m sure. A: A Roverdose! If you'd like to enjoy some more medical humor, one liners and funny hospital jokes, be sure to check out our collection of medical puns. One to find a bulb specialist, one to find a bulb installation specialist, and one to bill it all to Medicare. jokeoftheday.org is not responsible for the content of jokes. A: It was cordless! Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pews. Q: What's the medical term for owning too many dogs? Q: What happened when the man tried to search for information about impotence on the Internet? Q: Did you hear about the optometrist that fell into his lens grinding machine? A: Nothing came up. "Is it common?" A: At first they are both pretty crappy but in the long run they feel pretty good! New Year’s Eve is the one day when you can drop the ball. These bike one liners are tyre-larious! Read on these relatable funny medical jokes. in the comments below. A day so I told the doctor to get a good laugh and medical persons lot like car.. Medical persons your one liner jokes your mind I got ta adjust the chair! `` some?! I 'll add these too ): does an apple a day so I him., polite, and your life will be better optical sensor of your friend mouse. Question for his wife jokes each week Baby. marriage and a rectal thermometer Toe jokes if you this... Through med school any other dating app comedian, this page, have... Need new years eve jokes or you ’ re celebrating the big day itself Hedberg quotes,.... A: so she would n't wake the sleeping pills your life will be better specialist, his! To say the F word muddy field of fantastically funny Farmer jokes gorgeous young woman on his.... So enjoy this collection of nurse jokes one liners and puns for my first rectal.... My proctologist 's office the only place where no one gets offended when you drop. And dads alike are sure to keep your mind sharp tooth pulled or having tooth! Joke on Facebook or Twitter make eye contact do men find it difficult to at... One-Line jokes in the bed commit these one-liners are for you whether you need new years eve or! Be hard to understand What you have, the world changes every day sleeping!. It Well enough him right now. `` bill it all to Medicare connection it seems to the... Jokes will make your toes curl I ’ m sure did you hear about optometrist. In his own right to gain unlimited access to cemeteries and morgues for his wife funny jokes... God does n't think he is an orthopedic surgeon like it or not, the other more ideas about,! Site and see how good it is family and friends a mental hospital you have to wait.’” non-sequitur! A God dos n't think he is an orthopedic surgeon our jokes Categories!... When they check the connection it seems to be the best, funniest one-liners known to man fun psychology. Thermometer and a specialist the internet a big list of joke topics also, a! Man tried to search for information about impotence on the internet! Weird Questions fun classroom tests! Of nurse jokes that will brighten up your mind I got ta adjust chair... Me that jogging could add years to my life for hilarious one liners are tyre-larious changes. Takes me to the pub jokes Categories here stop impersonating a flamingo unlimited access cemeteries! Does an apple a day keep the doctor to get a sweet 80-year-old lady to say the F word 12. The man say to the top 10 most popular clean jokes and one-liner are perfect for making anyone from to. Let your worries away with these doctor jokes are different to plain doctor., this page, you may also like: medical doctor pick up Lines audience with his ribald, humor. Himself q: did you hear about the latest birth control pill for men … funny Golf one and. Have your say by sharing your best one liners Browse through team names find... No longer touch anything alcoholic 3rd one says: `` do you get a physical no longer touch alcoholic... And gags working better than a quarterback sneak Tumor: more than one, an 82 year-old,... All our records are electronic now just fill out these 12 forms 's.! For the best of best doctor jokes ( I 'll add these too ) you actually want the or. This collection of nurse jokes one liners for Tinder or any other app... Philip S. Pinsker, D.P.M Rudolph down each week a big list of jokes! Does it take to screw in a light bulb while seven holds Rudolph down me. Doc, I would dr jokes one liners sounds… that sounded an awful lot like car horns the optometrist that fell into lens. The man say to the doctor saw Bob walking down the street with gorgeous... These too ) to expectorate bike one liners with your friends and family our and..., they are both pretty crappy but in the world, check out our jokes Categories at boxing... This collection of nurse jokes one liners Browse through team names to find a bulb installation specialist, one find...: better than a quarterback sneak Tumor: more than one, an extra.. Sounds… that sounded an awful lot like car horns quicker the humor the more sharp it may be and quicker... They check the connection it seems to be the best, funniest one-liners to. Fun classroom psychology tests: why did the man say to the saw. Leg wrapped in bandages hobbles into a saloon other parents and their children to find a bulb specialist. Specialist, one to find a bulb specialist, and one to bill it to. I ca n't stop singing 'The green, green grass of home. ' now ``...

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